journey to "paradise"

That night, I felt like opening my eyes. I could see the situation surround me, and than suddenly I was floating… flew out of my body! Yup, I could see myself lying on bed, so slight and free.

And then I tried to escape to somewhere I wanted to be… and I did. In just one blink, I’m in my bedroom of my ex-home, in Jepara. But I found nobody there. I felt lonely so I decided to float away, like I used to do in my dreams…

I left that little house to the dark blue sky, floating up through the roof. In just few seconds, I can see the mountains behind me, tiny houses, and the cloud.

But suddenly I felt like being sucked to the sky, I flew higher, higher,... faster, faster.. to an insane speed that I couldn’t resist. The cloud looked like a curtain that closed the earth as I flew higher. The earth behind me was getting smaller into a dot of blue, among the darkness of universe. I was a part in it and didn’t know where to go.

I was happy and afraid at the same time since I flew so fast that everything I passed turn to fast moving dark particles. It was no longer clear whether I was going up or down, until I landed to a place I didn’t know. It’s an open field, like the one in front of my ex-home. It was dark. Something’s telling me that I’m in a different world.

There was a moon. It’s not quite a moon, actually. It’s just a red ball of fire like Saturn in the sky, with a ring of lightning as the belt. It moved, and—for me—it’s rather terrifying object than amazing one.

And then I could see a group of giant bird soaring up. I could see them in that dark sky for the green light they have on the tips of their wings was shining. I felt terrified since every clasp of their wings created thunders that made the ground trembling.

A voice—I would prefer say it a feeling—offered me to see another side of that world. I spontaneously agree (In that terrifying situation, who wouldn’t?). In just a blink, I was in a big house, a white beautiful bigger house than others. It was built on the body of a green grassy hill. The smaller house built below the bigger one. I was on upstairs, so I walked down through white shiny stairs.

“It’s heaven,” the voice said. (Yeah, right! I’m visiting heaven?).

But I prefer to explore that house than trusting that voice. Since I could go anywhere, I wanted to find someone I’m missing so bad; my passed away mom and my lovely girl.

“She’ll be here,” the voice replied.

And then a woman knocked the doors. I run happily to open it. But then I swallow a pain for it was not Mom, nor her. A beautiful woman came in, held my hands, unveiled her clothes and said, “They’re not here, I replace them,”

I couldn’t remember the rest she said, for she made that “heaven” no longer fun, and the alarm awoke me.

It was 04.00 o’clock in the morning in a calm Jakarta when I found her SMS, “Selamat pagi sayang.aku br m tidur,br kelar semua. Aku jg kangen,kangen ******** kamu juga.”

And I realize that I have a reason to stay here rather in paradise.