Love The Small Things

Here you go again. Floating to the universe. Starting from seeing your own feet leaving the ground. You are excited as you can fly! Like Superman. But wait,.. you are floating higher, higher, and faster, faster. Its like you're sitting on the tail of an airplane, which is taking off.

You fly higher and higher in an insane speed that makes your heart beat faster and faster. As you float high, you can see the trees and the yard below are just part of greater jungles, with mountains, and surrounded by the blue ocean.

You keep floating, and you start to realize that you are leaving the earth. You know you are dreaming, you can feel your heartbeat. But you cannot wake up. You are getting panic due to the insane speed. Its like being sucked up to the universe.

In a few seconds, the beautiful blue globe of the earth amuse you, and you suddenly long to get yourself back. But it's not your call. The universe is sucking you up. And then you can see the galaxies, planets.

Enjoyable? Not really.

Have you ever been in panic mode while you're in the car or bus, and the driver is speeding like insane? You can see things move so fast from the window. You are being tortured with the speed.

You don't bump to any rocks and asteroids, as they are all passing through your body. Sometimes you move in a spiral motion, and then changes to a straight shoot forward. You are no longer sure you are moving up or down.

You felt your adrenaline rush has dried out. The speed is killing you. But the problem is that you cannot control it, nor make it stop. You can only hope that it will last sooner before your beating heart explodes.

It feels like riding a never ending roller coaster, but the ride is your body (or soul, maybe).

"Please, I want to hold the rose." you whisper in your heart. Why the rose? You don't know either. Maybe because it symbolizes the state of resting for a while and enjoying a beautiful thing. But it's no secret that you love nature and plants.

And it works! You are heading to the beautiful blue earth again. Still in insane speed but this time you are going down. Its like you are about to crash.

But wait! It flies back higher, like the landing has been cancelled and your body sucked up again in an accelerated insane speed. Your heart starts beating up faster again.

And as you feel hopeless, and about to give up, suddenly hope is back. You are moving slower, getting closer to the earth and then to the forest.

You began to see the trees clearer and then the grass, and then flowers. This time in a slower movement. But still moving.

And hop!

It stops and you are at the meadow of yellow roses. After all that happened, they are the most beautiful thing ever happen to you. You are happily observing the detail of the petals and the leaves, which are waving under the breeze.

"If you love something beautifully, you must love the little things, Dad," said a voice behind you.

As you turn back, its your baby girl there. She is collecting the flowers just like you used to do with her when she was just 5 years old.

Your heart melts. And so your eyes. You miss her so bad due to this shit-uation. She smiled at you and still collecting the flowers.

But as you are about to hold her, the universe doesn't allow you. It sucks you up again. You starts floating, leaving her.

"Ayaah!! Ayyaaah!!" You can hear her cry.

This time around you decide to fight. You pushed your mind to take yourself fly back to her. You can still hear her cry. And it gives you more power to fight while whispering: dear God, please.

And then your body moves back to her, still in a speeding mode. You find a hope on small trees there. You are struggling to grab one of them, while she's running to you.

You are still being sucked like a nail floating toward gigantic magnet up there. You feel the pain in your left hand, which is holding to the trunk. But that's okay, as you can see her running closer to you.

You keep holding on.

And yes!

She is in your arm. You hold her with your right arm, while you're bleeding left arm still preventing yourself from leaving.

Holding her tight. Its the best thing ever happen. You cry due to happiness--or sadness as you knew it wont last long, you are not sure.

And then you open up your eyes. You wake up from the dream, and realize: the only thing that real is the tears.